Friday, March 28, 2008

Greetings and Salutations: The Blog Talks Back

Dear C,
You really should be working instead of blogging. You know that right? Just checking. Anyway, how's it going? You look a little peaked today, is everything okay? You're not nervous are you... About that stupid tournament?

C, you know I think you're swell and all, but let's face it: you're a nutcase. What are you so worried about? Remember fencing is fun, that's why you do it. This is just another way to go and have fun with your pals. You must chill.

Alright, now that we've got that cleared out of the way, let's go through our tournament checklist. Uniform, shoes, snacks, blah, blah, blah. I mean the other checklist.

1) Warm up. You always stink up the first one or two pool bouts, so warm up as much as possible.
2) DON'T look at the ratings of the people in your pool. Don't look at the ratings of the people you will fence in the DEs. Don't try to guess how good they are by the state of their uniform, or their age, or religion, or anything else. Everyone is simply a fencer, just like you. And they want to win too.
3) Don't get mad at your husband if you have a bad bout. He loves you anyway and doesn't deserve your snarkiness.
4) One touch at a time. I can't stress that enough. One touch at a time, no matter how bad or good the previous touch was.
5) For the love of all that is good and holy, if you start to feel bad about yourself, stop immediately. Feeling bad is an endless downward spiral, so just don't. Whistle a happy tune. Splash some water on your face. Anything but letting that negative voice win.
6) No excuses. If you lose, it's just because that's how you did that day. It's not because you didn't eat the right breakfast. It's not because you were fighting a big dude and it's not because your shorts were riding up. It just was. Practice starts again on Monday.

So, are we set? Good! Go get 'em tiger!

Your Blog

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